Losing Your Love | Kylen Perry

Porch, how are we doing? You doing all right? Hey, it's great to be back. It's great to see you. I'm so glad you're here. Thanks for making the time to join us this evening, not just those of you who are here in the room, though it's so good to be with you. Special shout-out to Porch.Live in all of our locations that are tuning in, especially Porch.Live Springfield, Porch.Live Des Moines, and Porch.Live Fresno. Can we give it up for Porch.Live, everybody? It's great to be together.

Just two weeks ago today, my life got flipped upside down, because on November 5, at 2:06 p.m., coming in at 8 pounds and 8 ounces, Brooke Perry's and my firstborn son Kash Levi Perry came into the world. Checks over stripes. Am I right? The guy looks good. It's so on brand that we would have a Tuesday baby, that he would show up, and I'm so grateful to TA that he would be a pinch hitter for me, that he would show up and bless our room.

Now, I don't know if you've ever been on the fence about raising kids, but take it from somebody who has been at it for two weeks. I recommend it. I think it's certainly worth the commitment should the day ever come that you can do so, and I say that as somebody who has not ever been one who was totally infatuated with the idea of having a whole household full of kids. I'm not the guy who thought, "Man, I can't wait to have a house full of kids." That's not what I was looking for.

I knew I wanted to have a big family. I came from a big family, yet I knew what it would cost me to have a son. I was under no presupposition that it would not cost me something. I knew I was going to be giving up an immense amount of sleep. I knew we'd be spending a lot of money on all the latest baby gear. I also knew I would be piled up with pounds of dirty diapers. I knew it would cost me a lot.

What I also knew is that this little guy wasn't going to contribute anything to our house. He wasn't going to offer to pay the bills. He wasn't going to offer to pick up around the place. I knew he wasn't going to agree to try to clean up his own mess. Instead, he was going to rely upon us to do that. In fact, he really hasn't been pulling his weight at all to this point. Yet, despite knowing all of this beforehand and realizing it every single day since, I'm totally enchanted with the kid.

I love him. I'm mesmerized by the fact that he's mine and Brooke's, that he is made in our image, that he is from God for us. I'm blown away by the fact that he is my child. I didn't realize just how wonderful it would be, just how captivated I'd feel, just how mesmerized…I would find myself sitting on the couch and just looking at him, just staring at him, just waiting for him to do the next thing…yet that has been my reality. I am, nonetheless, totally enchanted with this kid. I am wholeheartedly, totally, undeniably in love with the little guy.

Now, what has happened to me over the course of the last two weeks is I've had a revelation that the way I love my son is an accurate reflection of how we should love Jesus. We should be totally enchanted with him, absolutely mesmerized, captivated, gripped, arrested by the fact that "You're mine? I get to have you forever?" Yet what happens is we realize what it costs us. It doesn't pound up in piles of dirty diapers, but it does look like inconveniences in life, troubles that may be ahead. Some costs will incur in the eyes of other people as we walk with Jesus.

What happens along the way is our enchantment is replaced with disenchantment. It becomes disillusionment. It even becomes discouragement to walk with him any longer. It shouldn't feel that way. That's what has hit me over the last two weeks. If all of this is true, if Jesus really is wonderfully enchanting and totally mesmerizing and captivates the hearts of any and every person because he is God, it doesn't make sense, then, that I would ever fall out of love with him, yet, if we can be honest with ourselves…

If you can look yourself in the eye tonight, you might find yourself in the spot where this is, in fact, true for you. You may know, "Man, I was totally enamored with him at first. I couldn't get enough of him. I wanted to spend time with him. I wanted to sit and learn as much as I could. I wanted to soak in the Scriptures, because it was the way I was getting to understand who he was and learning who I now am," yet somewhere along the way you fell off. You lost your love. Your excitement fell flat, your passion burnt out, and your affections ran dry.

What do you do when that's the case? That's the question I want to answer tonight. What do we do when we find ourselves totally disenchanted with the person of Jesus? To answer it, I want us to look at the book of Revelation. So, if you have a Bible, you can turn with me to Revelation, chapter 2. Revelation is the last book in your Bible, so it's easy to find.

We've been in a series called Disciple where we've been looking at what it means to, very simply, walk with Jesus. That idea is one that many of us hear, and we tune our ears out. We turn our brains off, because we think we know what it means to walk with him, yet we've been challenging you with this idea that to be a true disciple of Jesus is not just to know about the guy; it's to know him personally.

We've been looking at it through the eyes of the guys who knew him best, who walked with him nearest, those disciples whose stories we read in the gospel accounts. Tonight, what I wanted to do as I came back is I actually wanted to break the script. I wanted to pause our regularly scheduled programming. I wanted to make an exception to our rule of being in this series, because I wanted to tackle an idea that…

Over the last several months, as I've sat with many of you in one-on-one coffees out in this coffee shop, spending time together, learning your stories, what I've realized is across this room, we have a big problem. I've been trying to talk to you about what it means to walk with Jesus, yet so many of us are convinced that we're walking with Christ when in reality we are just wandering about in the Christian life.

We're not moving with any kind of conviction. Instead, we're just meandering along in comfort. We know the right things to do, we know the right things to say, we know the right places to go, we know the right people to spend time with, yet we do all of these right things for all of the wrong reasons. So, I wanted to take an evening to challenge this idea and help us get on the same page of what it means to walk with Jesus rightly.

So, looking at verse 1, the right reason for walking with Jesus. It says, "To the angel of the church in Ephesus write: 'The words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand, who walks among the seven golden lampstands.'" Jesus is speaking to the apostle John, and John is receiving a revelation, a vision from God for us.

We know it's speaking specifically to the church at Ephesus in this moment, so we should be good Bible students and ask, "What do we know about Ephesus?" Well, there are a couple of things you should know about the place of Ephesus. Ephesus was the capital city of Asia Minor. It was socially advantageous to live there. It was an incredibly wealthy city, and it was politically strategic if you were a person of power.

It attracted the likes of anybody who was somebody, people like Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Cleopatra, and Mark Antony. They all made stops in Ephesus. It was like New York. Anybody who's somebody lives there. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere. Yet what we know is it wasn't just an attractive spot for the rest of the world; it was also an attractive spot for Christians to go.

Some of the most significant believers we know of made their way through Ephesus, people like Paul, Timothy, John, Priscilla, Aquila, Tychicus, and Apollos. All of them made their way through the church at Ephesus at some point. I don't know about you or who you podcast on Sundays, because the guy preaching up here may not be the guy you want to listen to at different points, but what you need to know is you don't need to podcast anybody else, because this is an NBA super team of talent.

Their preaching rotation is stacked, because these people are unlike anybody else. These names may not mean much to you, yet of the 27 books in the New Testament, 19 of them were penned in some degree by these names in specific. Like, 70 percent of your New Testament came from these people who taught at the church at Ephesus in some time. This church had an embarrassment of riches when it came to spiritual influence. The results corresponded accordingly. We read it in verses 2 and 3.

"I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance, and how you cannot bear with those who are evil, but have tested those who call themselves apostles and are not, and found them to be false. I know you are enduring patiently and bearing up for my name's sake, and you have not grown weary."

Can we just call it like it is? The Christians in Ephesus are better Christians than all of us. Jesus just gave nine commendations, descriptors, that approved of their religious zeal, just how awesome they were outwardly speaking. He says, "Hey, I know your works, your toil, your patient endurance. You can't bear with those who are evil. You've tested those who call themselves apostles and are not. You found them to be false. I know you're also enduring patiently and bearing up for my name's sake, and you've not grown weary."

These people are so zealous for the things of God, to live the Christian life, that if they were here in our modern time, they would literally, at 5:00, in the middle of rush hour, hop in their car, gas it up, and get out in the midst of traffic just so they could encourage people at the most heinous time of day. That's how zealous they were for the goodness of God. They were zealous to live this life God had called them to live.

They are genuinely, hands down, more impressive than any one of us, yet the next thing Jesus says is pretty alarming, because he says in verse 4, "But I have this against you [despite all of that], that you have abandoned the love you had at first." So, let's make sure we have this straight. Here we have a group of successful, persevering, theologically interested, and resilient believers who in the eyes of the world are the types of people Jesus should be most proud of.

They're radically countercultural. They're obedient to the Word, yet Jesus just said, "Hey, I observe all of your outward obedience, yet when I cut straight to the inward heart, what I see is someone who may do all of the right things but who does them for all of the wrong reasons. There's not a white-hot flame of affection for me. Instead, all you have is a cold sense of duty and doctrine."

They looked the part. They sang the songs, prayed the prayers, answered the questions, showed up on Tuesday nights, and made sure to take down good notes and take a picture to share with the rest of their followers on social media. They did all of the right things. They looked the part, but they had no heart. They abandoned their first love. That's what it says. Which is an interesting way of describing what they did.

They didn't forget their first love. They did not lose their first love. They didn't misplace their first love. They didn't lose that loving feeling at any given point in time. No, it says they abandoned their first love. This is a love they did not lose; it's a love they left. Which begs the question…What did they do that led to that end? How did they fall out of love with God?

Well, how do you fall out of love with anything? One quick Google search, and you can read what psychologists would ascribe as being the primary reasons we fall out of love with anyone or anything. You stop communicating. You have unrealistic expectations of the other person. You lack intimacy. You grow bored. You break trust. You even fall in love with someone else.

I remember when I was 14 years old, some neighborhood buddies and I came up with this bright idea that we wanted to start a garage band. Doing the only sensible thing, I decided I needed to buy a guitar, because I wanted to be a part of the crew. So I went and bought a baby blue, speckled Fender Stratocaster. I loved that thing. I loved that guitar. I loved showing it to people. I loved talking about it with people, and I loved the credibility it gave me amongst other people, the fact that I was in the band.

Yet, if you asked me today, "Hey, man, can you play the guitar?" I would say, "No." Why? Because though I outwardly loved that guitar, I inwardly did not love that guitar. Though I publicly loved that guitar, I privately did not love that guitar. I would pull it out of the case, and I would take it and show it and talk about it, yet whenever I would go home, I'd put it on its stand and push it to the corner, much the same way many of us take God and push him into some corner of our lives until it is benefiting to pull him out and show him to those who are in our sphere of influence. You see, we don't want God; we want what God gives.

It's not coincidental that in John 1:38, the very first question Jesus ever asks the disciples is one that points straight to the heart of their affection. He asks them, "What do you want?" Not "What do you know?" or "What do you need?" or "What do you believe?" or "Where did you come from?" No. The first question Jesus ever asks his disciples is "What do you want?" because he knows whatever it is you desire will ultimately drive your life.

What you want in life determines where you go in life. At least that's what Proverbs 4:23 says. It says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Everything you do flows from your heart. Literally everything. There's no exception. What you want most determines what you want now. Everything you do, everything you say, every place you go, every thought you think, everything you eat… It all points to the fact that you love whatever that is the most.

So, when you look at your actions…how you spend your time, where it is you go, the words you speak…what do those actions tell you about what you really, truly care about? Do you really care about your career? Like, you just want to have a seat at that table. You just want to ascend to that position. You just want to make it onto Forbes 30 Under 30. You're just trying to bank a million in this next year. What is it for you? Is it your career?

Maybe it's your relationship. Maybe it's spending time with that guy or that girl. Maybe it's the reason you're willing to push physical boundaries. What you really want is to be connected to that person, and you're willing to even bend the rules to make it happen. You're willing to compromise your purity to make it happen.

Maybe it's not a relationship. Maybe it's an experience. You know the days are numbered. "I don't have long, Kylen, so I want to live it up. I want to have a good time. I want to be happy in life. I want to make my days count." Maybe it's not experience. Maybe you really care about what others think of you, so much so that you're willing to morally compromise, bend your integrity, and even blur the lines between what's right and what's wrong just so people will think well of you.

Maybe that's not the case. Maybe you care what people think of you so much that whenever you walk away from a conversation you had where you said something stupid or did something dumb, you can't help but replay it over and over and over and over again. All you do is beat yourself up over the fact that "I can't believe I said that. That was so stupid. What do they think of me right now?" You're riddled with social anxiety.

Maybe you really care about Jesus or you're just playing the Christian game. Do you say one thing but then do something else? Do you look the part when really you couldn't care less? Friends, so many of us have an aptitude for God, but we do not have an appetite for God. We know. This game is easy. It's not hard to be a Christian. You just have to be a good person. You just have to do the right things. You just have to say the right things. You have to show up to the right places. You have to spend time with the right people. You have to make sure you repent.

It's not hard to play this game, yet so many of us have grown content with an aptitude for God when in reality we need an appetite for God. We have all the knowledge. We can handle ourselves in spiritual conversations. We can answer all of the questions, but we have lost the internal rumblings of wanting more of God for solely ourselves. We have no hunger pains for holiness.

Seeing your friends, meeting other young adults, running into certain people here on Tuesday nights who you're really hoping you might bump into at some point, or serving even, showing up on Sundays, singing the songs, enjoying the worship, taking notes down whenever the teaching is happening… All of those are good things, but they're not God things. They're not the best things. They're not the right thing. If you're showing up for those reasons and those reasons alone, then you want what God has to give and don't want God himself.

So, what do you do if this is you? Verse 5 tells us. "Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you repent." How do you stir your affections for Jesus again if you find yourself at a place tonight where you're not actually walking in the warmth of his company but have subscribed instead to cold orthodoxy or comfortable Christianity? How do you reignite the flame of faith? How do you get your affections burning again? He tells us. You remember, you repent, and you return.

You remember. You remember what it was like when you first met Jesus, where you were, how that felt. You're reminded of the joy of your salvation, and then you repent. You look at these things that led you away from God, which distanced you away from his company, and you turn them aside. You push them off, and you move back toward him. You return. You go back to doing those things that catalyzed your love for God and all the affection he deserves in the first place. You remember, repent, and return.

You don't recognize, regret, and repeat. Notice it doesn't say that. You don't recognize, "Yeah, man. I'm farther away from God than I actually want to be, but I don't know necessarily how to get back," and then you regret the fact that "Man, I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have done that thing. I shouldn't have said those words. I shouldn't have heard that person." Then, despite the fact that you know you shouldn't, you repeat it anyway. That's not what he's saying.

He's not telling you to just recognize it's wrong, regret the fact that it happened, but then still repeat it come tomorrow and come the day following and come the day thereafter. He's telling you to remember, repent, and return. As I was prepping this… I know there are some of you here in the room, and you're like, "But, Kylen, it's too late. I started off this year, and I had the best of intentions. I really wanted it. I wanted to walk with God this year. I wanted to give him my whole heart. I wanted to go all the way in. I wanted to push full tilt in my faith, yet I did that thing or I spent my time with that person or I did that thing I can't take back."

I don't know what it is for you. You need to know it's not too late. Your love may have run out, but your time has not run out. You can remember tonight, you can repent tonight, and you can return tonight. How do you do that? Well, we actually get a really good picture of what this looks like, some good handles to hold, if we go back to the beginning of Ephesus, if we turn the page, if we rewind the tape and look at where they were before they abandoned their first love. We see that in Acts, chapter 19.

What you need to know in Acts 19, just for some background, is that Paul comes to the church at Ephesus, and he gives the Holy Spirit to some of the disciples he finds there. What happens when he gives the Holy Spirit to these disciples is revival breaks out. People start repenting of their sin. They commit their lives to Christ, and miracles are happening. Life for these people gets turned upside down, because that's what happens when you meet Jesus. Everything changes when you meet Jesus. So, we read this in Acts 19, starting at verse 17.

"And this became known to all the residents of Ephesus, both Jews and Greeks. And fear fell upon them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was extolled. Also many of those who were now believers came, confessing and divulging their practices. And a number of those who had practiced magic arts brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all. And they counted the value of them and found it came to fifty thousand pieces of silver. So the word of the Lord continued to increase and prevail mightily."

So, what can we learn from the life of these Ephesians at the beginning? Three things that correspond with remembering, repenting, and returning.

1. If you want to remember, you have to get focused on Jesus. If you're here, and the flame of faith has gone quietly dim in your life…you feel disenchanted with Jesus, you're not sure if this walk is really worth it, you feel like it might be too late…the first step you take on the road to remembrance is you get focused on him. You get focused on Jesus. That's what it says in verse 17. After seeing all that had been done in the name of Jesus, fear fell upon them all.

Everyone who witnessed the power of God in this story in the preceding verses… Their response is they extol Jesus as Lord. They look at him, and they're like, "You're the guy. You're the Lord. You're the Master. You're the one in charge." That's their response. Now, we don't use the word extol a whole lot in modern English, but the idea of extol is to worship or to praise or to celebrate.

It's what you do whenever you go to a big game and you're supporting a team you really love and they score. You go to a concert, and that song comes on. "Boy, I've been waiting for that song." What response do you have? You lift your hands. You get a little bit undignified. You start bouncing around. You start slapping hands. You start cheering with the people around. You start to celebrate, because you are worshiping something that's worthy of your worship.

That's what's happening right here. The Ephesians experience wonder and awe, and the response is revival breaks out. Psalm 22:3: "Yet you are holy, enthroned on the praises of Israel." That word enthroned means God inhabits or dwells in the praises of his people. That's what Israel is. It's the people of God. What's so significant about that is the fact that when we praise God, guess what? He's here. He's present. Just let that sink in on you.

When we sing in just a minute, God delights to inhabit your song. He wants to be here with his people. Their response is one of radical reverence, yet ours is so often a response of casual indifference. "Oh, this song again. I've heard this one already. We sang this on Sunday." We move through the motions. We raise our hands in the right moments. We beat our fists because we don't want to just stand still. We look the part, but we've lost the heart.

What we see for these Ephesians is that at the appearance of God's presence and power, they realize just how big he is and how small they are. We have to do the same thing. How do we do it? Well, you remember. Every single day, you get focused on Jesus. Every single day, you think as often and as much of Jesus as possible. You give him quantity of thought and quality of thought in the same way as if you're trying to get good at anything.

If you're trying to learn to hit a golf ball, if you're trying to learn how to shoot a basket, if you're trying to learn how to shoot a gun…whatever it is for you…you have to put up a lot of shots, a quantity of repetitions, but you have to make the reps count. You also have to add to them quality of effort. That's what we do. That's how we get focused on Jesus. That's how we remember who he is and take this first step.

What does that actually look like? Well, it varies. It depends on the person. What stirs your affections? When you gather in here on Tuesday nights or when you come in on Sundays or you're spending time with God in the mornings, or whatever it is for you, what actually leads you to love God more? Whatever that is, you should do it a lot and with great intentionality. That's the idea.

If you want to grow in your love for Jesus, what you're going to have to do as you spend time with him is what you do with anybody if you want to spend time and grow a relationship. You're going to have to listen to him, and you're going to have to talk to him. What relationship thrives without communication? The way we communicate with Jesus is we read his Word, because all of this communicates who he is from him to us, and then we pray back.

When we pray, we're not just lifting up empty thoughts and words that bounce upon the ceiling. No, we're talking to God. We're communicating with Christ. You read the Word every single day. You pray often in private and in company. You get outside and marvel at the spectacle of God's creation. You find reason to be grateful, because our world gives us plenty of reason to complain.

You enjoy good food because it's from God. You spend time with good people in a way that leaves you feeling innocent by the end of it all. You do whatever it takes for you to love God more by the end of the day than you did at the beginning of it. You got that? That's how you remember. That's where you first start. You do whatever it takes.

Here's what you have to know: God comes wherever he's wanted. If you're showing up, and you're wanting for God and pursuing him in a way that accords with his Word and is obedient to his will, he'll come to you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. God comes wherever it is he's wanted. So, if God feels far off, the question is not where he has gone. The question is…Where haveyou gone? That's the first point. The second point is in verse 18. It says, "Also many of those who were now believers came, confessing and divulging their practices."

2. You have to repent, and the way you repent is you get honest about your sin. That's what we see in verse 18. That's how this works. When you see Jesus for how perfect he is, you see yourself for how polluted you are. The only natural thing to do in that moment, when you see how great he is and how wrong you are, is to repent. That's what all revivals are forged upon. That's the anvil upon which revivals are built. They're built upon repentance.

A revival doesn't come to a city until it first comes to an individual. I think it's fascinating. I'll probably make some enemies for this. In our nation right now, people are so invigorated about the idea of revival. They want a movement of God to sweep over the nation. I'm all for that. I think that's a great thing to desire, yet you cannot want for it to come to the nation before you want it to come to the person.

It doesn't come to the masses; it comes to the one. National revival is birthed through personal renewal, which is why we have to get honest about our sin. Personal renewal happens when we take a good, hard look inside of ourselves and we see, "Wait. What's wrong?" and we respond the same way they did.

What we see from these Ephesians is they understand Jesus' willingness to forgive sins, and they're like, "What? You're willing to forgive sins? Wait, wait. Here's everything I have. Here's all of my sin. If you're willing to forgive it, let me get it all out to you, because I don't want any of it to go unforgiven. I want all of it to be known. I want all of it to be covered. I want all of it to be washed. Jesus, this is everything I have. Let me tell you it all."

Which is why it's so fascinating to me that we hide our sin from God and one another. Jesus is wanting to forgive it. He has the power to forgive sins, he and he alone. He has the power to love the very worst version of you, and it's the very reason he came. There is nothing in you that would ever turn him off, would ever turn him away, would ever lead him to say, "No, not you. You're the exception. Everybody else is great, but not you."

Your sin did not repel him; it compelled him. It didn't push him off; it pulled him in. He saw where you were, and he was like, "I don't want that for my people, so I'll do what it takes. I will swoop in and save the day. I will bear their sin. I will hang upon their cross, I will die their death, and I will rise from the grave for their sake." This is what Jesus is wanting, which is why we should be honest about our sin and should turn away from it.

Second Peter 3:9 says, "The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance." Luke 15:7 says, "I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent." Do you want to send the heavens into a ruckus accord? Then repent. That's all it takes.

Let me be really clear on this, because I think often we can get this confused. When I talk about repentance, I'm not talking about remorse. Repentance is not just feeling bad about the bad thing you did; it's turning away from the bad thing you did and moving back toward the only good one, which is God. It's leaving it behind. It's turning away.

Some of you here are so grieved over your sin, but not so much that you're ready to let it go. You're so eaten up, the struggle is so hard, yet you're not so consumed that you would finally let Jesus win the battle for you. The best thing some of you can do tonight, the bravest thing some of you can do tonight is actually repent of that sin, that lingering sin which has plagued you for so long. The formula is not hard. It's acknowledge it, confess it, accept his grace, and walk away. That's all it takes.

This could be, for some of you, the single moment you've been wanting for all year, to finally feel the freedom Christ has afforded you, if you would come down, repent of your sin, and leave it here forever. Do you want that? Because that's on the table tonight. You can have that. That's available here. If you want to stir your affections for Jesus, then you have to repent, because God is closer to honest sinners than silent sufferers.

3. We have to return, which means we have to get really serious about surrender. That's what it says in verses 19-20. "And a number of those who had practiced magic arts brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all. And they counted the value of them and found it came to fifty thousand pieces of silver."

The Ephesians fall so in love with Jesus they start regularly repenting, and they burn up these books from their old way of life, all of these books about magical arts and divination. They once cherished them, yet the minute they realize they stand in opposition to their true love, they strike a match and get rid of them.

They got so serious about their surrender that nothing would stand in the way of them getting more of Jesus. We have to do the same. There are some things here tonight that are robbing you of your love for Christ…robbing you. What do you do to prevent being robbed? You lock your doors. You set your alarms. You install some cameras.

I remember when my wife and I bought our house in Houston, it came with a security system installed, and I loved it, not just because I could check out the footage and see what was going on down the street but because I knew I was able to protect the ones I loved. Some of you are getting robbed, and you're doing nothing about it. The Enemy is swooping in to steal your joy and take your affection, and you're letting him, when in reality there are steps you can take tonight. So, let's talk about those really practically.

There are some things in your life (and here's the thing: they may not be bad things; they may be totally morally neutral) that you need to give up, like social media that stirs up comparison, staying over at your boyfriend's house because it's just too late, playing sports because you get overly competitive (that was one for me), hanging out with those friends you always have one too many with, listening to that music or watching that TV show.

Whatever it is, we have to get serious about setting those things aside. Whatever is robbing your affection of Jesus, you have to cut it out of your life. You have to light it on fire. You have to burn it where it stands. You have to get serious about surrender. Here's the thing. I know this has been a really heavy talk. I knew that coming in. I felt this pressure to load this thing up with a bunch of stories to get a bunch of laughs, yet what I care more about than hearing your laughter is hearing your learning, knowing you're actually comprehending the truth of God's Word.

So this is another hard thing I want to tell you. Some of you want so badly for the anointing God has on someone else's life, yet you're not willing to pay the price to get it. Some of you want so badly for the blessing God has put on somebody else's life, but you're not willing to pay the price to get it. Some of you want so badly to get the kind of adoration God has given to someone else, yet you're not willing to pay the price to get it.

Here's what you have to know. The price of what you lose in this world is nothing in comparison to the prize of what you will find in Christ. That's why you have to give whatever it takes, because you get everything and more. That's the promise of Christ. In him are all the riches and fullness and glory of God. Why would you look anywhere else for it? Nothing is worth having if it keeps us from having him.

So, last story. It was this Tuesday exactly one year ago when I preached my final message here at The Porch before I accepted the offer to become the director here in Dallas. I remember, when my wife and I made the trip down to spy out the land and see if this is where God wanted us, we were really conflicted.

It's funny for people when I say that, because they're like, "What are you talking about, man? It's The Porch." Yet we were a part of something that was amazing in a ministry where God was moving and lives were changing and stories were shaping and ministry was growing. We were a part of something so significant that was right at the heart of who God is and what he wants for people.

So, when we came here, it was like, "Man, it's going to take a lot to get us out of where we've been. It's going to take more than just a big room with a lot of people and multiple streaming sites across the nation. That's not enough. I don't want to just show up and be the weekly entertainment. I don't care about the widespread crowds. I care about the lives of people, God moving in your story. What I know is it's happening where we are, so, God, I need to know if it's going to happen where we're going."

So I showed up here, and I preached a year ago today. I remember asking God, "Lord, what I want to see, what I'm begging you to give, the confirmation I require, if you'd be gracious enough to give it, is I need to see hunger, desire in the lives of these people." To not just hang their hats on the fact that The Porch is awesome…"Look at what God has done"…but to believe that God is not finished, that he's still doing something in this city, in your city, and in every city, not because of who we are but because of who he is.

As I preached that night, a stranger to this room and every single one of you in attendance, I remember I closed my Bible, shut my iPad, said "Amen," and walked off this platform, and as I did, I heard applause. Now that can feel really silly to you, like a trite confirmation, yet it wasn't an applause that approved of me; it was an applause that approved of this, that agreed with the Word and the God therein. It was an applause from a people that had been fed by this truth and were hungry for more.

I remember, when I walked off that platform, what I felt in that moment was what I feel still today, that God is far from finished in this place, not just because we have great facilities and a really talented band and all the right production equipment. No, none of those things. God is far from finished because of people like you and the hunger you have. Some of you are here, and you have lost that hunger, but you can find it again tonight. God comes wherever it is he's wanted. Are you wanting for him this evening?

We know Jesus Christ has proven all of this to us, because while we now know we should get focused on Christ, he never lost sight of you; while now we know we should be honest about our sin, Jesus loved your honest self most of all; and while we now know we should be serious about surrender, Jesus was so serious about himself he surrendered his life for your sake and mine. Are you hungry? He is wanting for you. He is willing to give the kind of life you want and even better still. Remember, repent, and return.

God, we're grateful for tonight. Thank you for this time. God, I just confess as I stand on this platform and have worked through this message, I was unsure of how this content would land, knowing that it's heavy and can feel hard, even inaccessible to some, to those here who don't know you, yet, Lord, what I'm begging, what I'm praying is that people would know, here at The Porch and in the lives of those who gather in this room, we will not settle for disenchanted discipleship, but we want to walk in all the wonder, splendor, and beauty you and you alone afford. We want you. God, we want you. Come to us now.